From Small Talk to Real Friendships: Finding Your People as a new Parent

Written By MOB MOBSTER

Hi Mobsters,

It’s Zoe here, mobster, mum and connection expert! In my latest blog for the Mums Who Build community I am talking alll about how to go from casual mum meet-ups to deep, meaningful friendships. Because parenting is easier (and more fun) with your people by your side!

Making friends as a grown-up can feel a bit awkward, can’t it? Add kids into the mix, and suddenly you’re spending more time chatting about nappies and nap schedules than anything remotely interesting. But here’s the silver lining: becoming a parent is also a brilliant opportunity to meet new people and build a circle of friends who really get you.

If you’re tired of small talk and ready for proper, meaningful friendships, here’s how to go about it.

Why “Mum Friends” Can Feel a Bit Samey

Let’s be honest – early days with mum friends often involve a lot of small talk about the kids. Sleep schedules, weaning tips, and how on earth to deal with toddler meltdowns seem to dominate. It’s comforting at first, but after a while, it can feel like you’re having the same conversation on repeat.

And when the kids are around, it’s tricky to have a proper chat. You’re constantly distracted by snack demands, nappy changes, or refereeing playground spats. Before you know it, the meet-up’s over, and you’ve barely touched on anything personal.

But every now and then, you catch a little glimpse – a knowing look during a tantrum, or a comment about what they used to do before kids – that suggests there’s potential for something more (it’s moments like this that Bex and Georgie themselves craved on maternity-leave and why they set up a community like Mums WHo Build!).

Why It’s Worth Making the Effort

Making new friends as a parent isn’t just about the kids. Having a group of local mates is a game-changer – whether it’s for impromptu playdates, a natter over coffee, or a much-needed wine night.

Plus, it’s your chance to connect with people who “get” where you’re at in life – not just as a parent but as a person. Think of it like starting school or a new job: it’s the perfect opportunity to meet people who could end up being friends for life.

How to Turn Mum Friends into Proper Friends

If you want to move past the small talk and find your tribe, here’s how to do it:

Step 1: Arrange a Playdate

Start small. A simple playdate is the perfect way to test the waters. Bank holidays, inset days, or a Saturday at the park are ideal times to suggest meeting up. It’s low-pressure, and the kids keep each other entertained while you chat.

Step 2: Look for Shared Vibes

Pay attention to the little things. If you’re the kind of parent who’s all about surviving the day with a bit of humour and the odd chocolate bribe, you’ll probably click with others who have the same approach (You’ll love the Mums Who Build community for sure!). Look out for those subtle signs – the eye rolls, the shared laughs over chaotic toddler moments – that suggest you’re on the same wavelength.

Step 3: Chat Beyond the Kids

During the playdate, try to steer the conversation away from nappies and tantrums. Ask about their job, what they enjoy doing (when they have the time), or even what they’re watching on telly. It doesn’t have to be deep – just something that gives you a glimpse of who they are beyond being a parent.

Step 4: Plan a Kid-Free Hangout

Here’s where the magic happens. If you’re feeling a connection, suggest meeting up without the kids. Whether it’s a coffee, a walk, or a cheeky G&T at the local pub, this is your chance to really get to know each other properly.

What You’ll Gain

Taking the plunge to deepen those friendships is so worth it. A solid group of friends can make all the difference, whether it’s for a last-minute playdate, a shoulder to cry on, or just someone to have a good laugh with.

These are the people who’ll help you through the tough days, celebrate the wins, and make parenting that little bit easier (and a lot more fun).

Final Thoughts

Finding your people as a parent takes a bit of effort, but it’s worth it. Take the time to look for shared vibes, don’t be afraid to suggest a meet-up, and trust your instincts about who you click with.

Before long, you’ll have a group of mates who make life feel that much brighter – kids or no kids. And let’s face it, life’s too short for surface-level chit-chat. You deserve real, meaningful friendships.

So go on – send that message, arrange that playdate, and see where it leads. Your people are out there, ready and waiting.

I’m Zoe, a connection expert, and my mission is to help mums rebuild their relationships—whether it’s with friends, partners, or even themselves. I’ve seen firsthand how meaningful connection can bring joy, energy, and a renewed sense of purpose into your life.

Let’s Work Together

If you’re ready to feel connected again, I’d love to help. You can:

What is Mums Who Build?

Mums Who Build is a supportive, empowering community for entrepreneurial and career-driven mums who want to connect, grow, and build financial confidence—all while juggling the realities of motherhood. Whether you’re starting a business, growing a side hustle, or looking for like-minded women who understand the challenges of balancing work, family, and personal ambition, this is the place for you. We believe in real conversations, meaningful connections, and practical support to help mums thrive both personally and professionally.

Looking for mum friends who get you? Want to build a support network beyond small talk?

🔗 Join the community today and start building real, meaningful connections

📲 Follow us on Instagram for daily inspiration, tips, and real talk

You don’t have to do this alone—your people are waiting! 💛 #MumsWhoBuild #FindYourPeople #MumCommunity #WomenWhoSupportWomen

MOB MOBSTER
Previous

If You Can Talk About Money, You Can Talk About Anything. So Let’s Start Talking
Next

Your Brain & Hormones: What No One Told Us