Returning to Work After Maternity Leave: What No One Tells You
Hi it’s Susie here, founder of HiHo Coaching. This week I am talking about returing to work after maternity leave - what no one tells you!
After 20 years in corporate negotiation and coaching countless parents through their return to work, I've heard the same refrain repeatedly: "Why didn't anyone tell me it would be like this?"
The transition back to professional life after maternity leave involves emotional and practical challenges that rarely make it into the standard advice. Today, I'm pulling back the curtain on the realities that caught even the most prepared parents by surprise.
The Emotional Terrain
Your relationship with work will change - and that's okay.
Many women I've coached express guilt over not feeling the same drive or ambition immediately upon returning. What they eventually discover is that their ambition hasn't disappeared, it's evolved.
"I was terrified that becoming a mother meant I wouldn't care about my career anymore," shares Hannah, an Account Manager I coached through her return. "What actually happened was a recalibration. I became more selective about where I invested my energy, which ultimately made me more effective."
The first day back feels like the first day of a new job.
Even if you've been with your company for years, returning feels like starting fresh. Your confidence may waver as you navigate updated systems, new team members, or projects that progressed in your absence, not to mention being back in ‘normal’ clothes.
The emotional whiplash is real.
One minute you're confident and excited about adult conversation; the next, you're hiding in a bathroom stall looking at baby photos. This emotional pendulum is completely normal and gradually stabilizes with time.
The Practical Realities
Your efficiency will skyrocket.
Necessity becomes the mother of invention. With compressed hours and hard childcare deadlines, returning parents often discover productivity superpowers they never knew they had. The luxury of procrastination disappears, replaced by focused execution.
Your body is still adjusting.
If you're breastfeeding, pumping at work presents logistical challenges that few discuss openly. Even if you're not, physical recovery and sleep deprivation can impact your stamina during those first weeks back.
"I was completely unprepared for how exhausting it would be," admits Stephanie, a retail buyer who returned after nine months of leave. "It wasn't just the work itself but the mental load of juggling everything."
For advice on breastfeeding or pumping at work: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/baby/breastfeeding-and-bottle-feeding/breastfeeding-and-lifestyle/back-to-work/
Your priorities become crystal clear.
Before parenthood, staying late or taking on additional projects might have been your norm. Now, with childcare arrangements and family commitments, you'll need to be more intentional about where you invest your time. This clarity can actually accelerate your career when channeled effectively.
Preparing for the Unsaid
While you can't anticipate every challenge, you can create conditions that support a successful transition:
Negotiate a phased return if possible. Using accrued annual leave to create shorter weeks initially can ease the adjustment for both you and your baby.
Find your parent allies at work. Connecting with colleagues who've navigated this transition provides practical wisdom and emotional support that formal policies can't offer.
Prepare for childcare complications. During your first months back, illnesses and unexpected childcare disruptions are almost guaranteed. Having backup options, understanding your company's policies and the law ( https://www.gov.uk/time-off-for-dependants) before these situations arise reduces stress considerably.
Reset expectations - especially your own. Perfection in all domains simultaneously isn't just unrealistic; it's unnecessary. Determine what "good enough" looks like in different areas of your life during this transition period.
The Unexpected Gifts
Amid these challenges, returning parents discover unexpected benefits that rarely make it into the conversation:
Newfound efficiency that transforms your approach to work
Enhanced perspective that helps distinguish genuine priorities from busy work
Deepened empathy that enriches client and team relationships
Improved boundary-setting that creates sustainable work patterns
Beyond Survival to Success
Returning to work after maternity leave isn’t just an emotional adjustment, it’s also a legal process. Your employer has obligations, and you have rights. From flexible working requests to ensuring you’re not disadvantaged for taking leave, it’s important to be informed. If you’re unsure about where you stand, take some time to review the legal side of returning to work
One key thing many parents overlook is their accrued annual leave during maternity leave. This can be a game-changer when planning a smooth transition back to work, helping you extend your time at home, ease back in gradually, or create more breathing space in your schedule. I’ve created a FREE Excess Annual Leave Workbook to help you figure out exactly what you’re entitled to and how to use it strategically. Grab your copy here: subscribepage.io/fgRFVP.
The goal isn't merely surviving your return to work but thriving in this new chapter. With proper preparation and support, this transition can become a catalyst for positive growth in your career.
